"Procrastinators often follow exactly the wrong tack. They try to minimize their commitments, assuming that if they have only a few things to do, they will quit procrastinating and get them done. But this goes contrary to the basic nature of the procrastinator and destroys his most important source of motivation. The few tasks on his list will be by definition the most important, and the only way to avoid doing them will be to do nothing. This is a way to become a couch potato, not an effective human being."
--John Perry, Structured Procrastination

"The whole idea is to give yourself a whole lot of really really constructive things to do as a way to avoid the really real things you need to be doing. [..] So as long as you're gonna waste time you might as well have a big range of things you can go procrastinate with that actually are reasonably good things to do. [..] Just make sure you've got reasonably healthy things as a way to avoid the stuff you really don't wanna go do."
--David Allen, @ 43 Folders' Productive Talk Episode 1: Procrastination

This is why the weekly review is so essential: it makes you choose things consciously to procrastinate with.

See this post also: My Take on Procrastination.

Recently I ran into this interesting article about soul mates on the web.

"You can almost always spot soul-mates, because they make each other more powerful as a team than they were apart! This is the first way to spot your soul mate.

If you are in a relationship, and you're having to rationalize how much this other person helps you (or hinders you) then they are not your soul mate. It's like two gloves of different shapes, purpose, and sizes. You can put them together, but they just don't look or work as good. Put two large handyman gloves together for the workman, or put two gardening size smalls together for the woman in the garden club, and now you can get some work done!

Take the word soul, add the definition with the definition for mate, and you've got a strong definition of a soul mate: "the core spiritual nature, immortal, inseparable even from death, mated to be together."

Considering this definition, let us also consider the second way to spot your soul mate: they are both aware of their spiritual nature. In most (I say most, because not all people acknowledge God publicly in the same way I do) cases, these two will have their eyes first upon God, second upon each other, third upon their purpose together. Their family, career, and other things will always follow in some priority after these three.

The third way to spot a soul mate is to recognize how the journeys of the two interrelate. All Soul mates are on a spiritual life journey. These journeys, when the souls coincide for maximum impact, almost always run parallel or coincide in such as way that that creates a relationship as much or more about the union, or the team, as the individual.

This is the third way to spot a soul mate: they put the team/partnership journey above their individual journey and desires. In the case of the woman and the man above, the choices are not so painful, as their joint purpose and joint relationship is going to support the individual's dream. The reason for this is that the individual's dream is complementary to the union in a soul mate relationship. At the same time, the relationship works in a way that each person's individual journey is fully supported. With soul mates, there is trust and respect. With trust and respect comes the ability to realize aspirations - both as a couple and as individuals.

The fourth way to spot your soul mate is to recognize how each partner (mate) brings real love into the other's life. If a person does not bring real love to you, but instead causes significant conflict, grief, angst, lack, and failure, then it is highly unlikely that this person is your soul mate. A soul mate helps to awaken your soul and makes it easier for you to learn the lessons you are meant to learn. A key difference is that the soul mate is not the lesson, they help you learn your lessons and support that growing process! The other relationships usually are the lesson and make it difficult to learn (especially when the participants are on a relationship merry-go-round of dysfunctional relationships).

Are you someone who is frustrated with searching high and low trying to find this soul mate, so much that you're starting to give up and feel it is a myth? You are not alone. However, there is hope for you in the faith of your clarity in the purpose of your mission. In the law of attraction, we must send out the thought and be something in harmony in order to connect with what or who we seek. This is the fifth way to spot your soul mate: there are harmonious and complementary natures between the two mated people.

Sometimes, when people are coming from ego, rather than spirit, the relationship becomes about what you have (possessions) rather than who, or who, you are (experiences). Soul mates are about experiences far more than possessions. Because you cannot take your possessions with you. Your spirit does not own your possessions. But your spirit does own your experiences."

Please find the rest of the article here

Never give up on searching. Soul mates do exist.

Did you notice there's just too much of anything?

Too much people, too much jobs, too much opportunities, too much thoughts, too much places, too much projects, too much fun, too much everything.

The problem is not that you don't have enough options, it's that you have too many.

Passion arises when you consciously decide to stick to some of them whatever it takes.

That's the real importance of selection.

Learn to say no so that you can say yes to the things you truly love.

This is so essential that I have to post it here. Originally posted in one of my favourite forums by Andy Martin from Manifest Revolution.

"The reason I didn't choose anything was because I was afraid of not choosing the best thing. I think lack of passion stems from the same root cause as boredom. In fact, they might just be the same thing. Boredom doesn't result from having nothing to do; it results from having too many appealing options. When you have many attractive and interesting options nothing rises above the rest -- it doesn't matter how high the line is, it's still a flat line. It turns into a sort of analysis paralysis."

This applies to so many parts of my life. Mainly to friendships and my projects at the moment (regarding businesses, see also my related post titled Decisions). If you're into music production, do you see how this is in parallel with EQing instruments?

Choose wisely.

I have already seen this video but I bumped into it again and got more out of it now.

1. About Connecting The Dots
You can't connect the dots looking forward. You can only connect them looking backwards. So you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future. You have to trust in something because believing that the dots will connect down the road will give you the confidence to follow your heart even when it leads you off the well-known path and that will make all the difference.

2. About Love and Loss
Sometimes life hits you in the head with a brick. Don't lose faith. I'm convinced that the only thing that kept me going was that I loved what I did. You've got to find what you love. And that is as true for your work as it is for your lovers. Your work is going to fill a large part of your life, and the only way to be truly satisfied is to do what you believe is great work. And the only way to do great work is to love what you do. If you haven't found it yet, keep looking. Don't settle. As with all matters of the heart, you'll know when you find it. And, like any great relationship, it just gets better and better as the years roll on. So keep looking until you find it. Don't settle.

3. About Death
When I was 17, I read a quote that went something like: "If you live each day as if it was your last, someday you'll most certainly be right." It made an impression on me, and since then, for the past 33 years, I have looked in the mirror every morning and asked myself: "If today were the last day of my life, would I want to do what I am about to do today?" And whenever the answer has been "No" for too many days in a row, I know I need to change something.

Your time is limited, so don't waste it living someone else's life. Don't be trapped by dogma--which is living with the results of other people's thinking. Don't let the noise of others' opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary.

I feel like operating very close to the consciousness level called "Love". I am awakening to my true purpose. I'm not identifying with my mind-created self (ego) anymore. I am focusing on service.

Don't beileve your own mind--it's primary purpose is to protect you (survival). That's why you experience fear that blocks most people. Say No to "What If".

Scott has just posted a fabulous article on Daily To-Do Lists.

I have also started using such lists a while back and it's boosting my performance as well. Although, using GTD for 2 years now (David states it takes 2 years only to get it), I don't feel like these lists could substitute the system. Most people have 50-150 open loops in their lives and GTD manages them properly. Additionally, the 6-level model of reviewing your work helps you align your projects and actions with your purpose, not to mention the other parts of the system.

What I do now is I use GTD in a hardcore way (I believe I'm a Black Belt) and make daily to-do lists each morning with the key things that I'd love to accomplish during the day. Still, I have many other actions defined in my trusted system that I can constructively use for procrastination purposes.

I don't believe a simple daily list is enough for most of us these days but it can definitely help focusing on the important tasks. The problem with these lists is that they don't help defining your work nor do they free you of stress, which in my eyes are much larger issues.

Currently I am considering integrating the daily list with my GTD calendar or the virtual tickler file.

Whenever I hear people complain talk about "getting rid of procrastination", it drives me as crazy as getting out of debt does Mr. Kiyosaki.

If you feel like procrastination is killing you just like many others in Steve's forums, here is my take: Accept it. Seriously. Don't expect any quick fixes. Stop looking for the single right answer.

The key is to never force yourself to give up on everything else because thing X needs to be done first. You won't accomplish the task and you won't accomplish anything else either.

The most successful people in the world are the biggest procrastinators, yet, they are the best in their field because they just keep doing things. They are not necessarily doing what seems to be needed at the moment but they are definitely progressing.

So here's what to do if you still "suffer" from procrastination:

First, accept that you won't be able to get rid of procrastination ever and move on.

Second, when you get that s#cky feeling (called resistance) again, ask yourself the question: what would I enjoy doing now? and start doing it. Usually the resistance will soon fade away (even if it doesn't, you've just accomplished something that's also important!)

Third, now that you know procrastination doesn't need to be "solved", start learning about it (and other related personal development topics such as the levels of consciousness) if you really want to get more productive. Covey's principle of separating the urgent from the important comes to mind (search the web for Covey quadrant) and David Allen's GTD system that helps you defining your work better. One of the key reasons to implement the GTD system is to always have a whole bunch of constructive tasks to procrastinate on. Not many people get that but David said it himself (see the podcast below).

Remember: It's a process, not a single event.

Have a productive (to)day using constructive procrastination!

Related articles on the web:
2 Rules to Stop Procrastinating by Trizoko
Overcoming Procrastination by Steve Pavlina
David Allen on Procrastination (Merlin Mann's 43Folders podcast)

Less-related articles:
Why Great Business Leaders Embrace Failures
Is Perfectionism Good for Your Business?
How to Work Smarter

"Life really began flowing for me when I finally let go of that ego junk, pride, and feelings of doubt and said to myself, "I'm just going to focus on making the best contribution I can. If I go broke doing that, I go broke. My fears and worries are just not that important compared to the difference I could make if I really gave this life my very best. If I'm here to make a contribution, then the universe had better back me up."
Steve Pavlina

"..getting the focus off the centeredness of your life on the business of serving. The irony of it is that when you get to the point where you're able to do it and let go of that outcome, all of the stuff that you chased after and worked so hard for and figured you had to have, begins to chase after you and show up in your life. You're no longer on the treadmill. It's like a surrendering."
Dr. Wayne W. Dyer

"Financial scarcity is what you attract when you focus on me, me, me — my needs, my problems, my wants. Financial abundance is what you attract when you focus on we, we, we — our needs, our challenges, our potential. The ego is too small a container for wealth."
Steve Pavlina

Covey's interdependence principle comes to mind too.

After having to eat in restaurants for 34324324 times in a row I just realized: we used to get into the trap of taking everything for granted instead of appreciating what we have. We can't enjoy all the little things, we even hate them. I can relate this to so many parts of my life. Keep telling to yourself: I choose to instead of I have to. It makes such a big difference in POV and you do it in every second anyways.

You need to reach a certain level of consciousness to realize that living proactively is essential ("life is either an adventure or nothing"). In other words, there are levels on which you first need to find your "why". Not as in "why to reach a goal" but "what's the point in doing anything else than necessary?". Despite being only 23, I have many hard years behind me and if I haven't lived them, I think wouldn't believe how different one's mindset can be. The typical example is that of the homeless: unless you have the food and the shelter, you won't think about caring, love, relationships, not to mention goal setting, financial independence and so on. I've been in a loop for many years which simply didn't allow me to build those bridges.

Recently I finished reading David R. Hawkins' book titled Power vs Force about the Levels of Human Consciousness. In the "dreaming" state (not to be confused with conscious visioning) one usually operates at the levels of fear (100), desire (125), anger (150), pride (175), maybe even at courage (200) and neutrality (250). Willingness (310), acceptance (350) and reason (400) are the levels which actually make you start building the bridges. ("Courage is the Gateway" anyways).

Personal development hit me a year ago when I operated at the levels of Apathy, Greaf, Fear and Desire and sometimes Courage also which provided the energy to stick to it. Looks like it took around 10 months to reach these higher levels. That's not too bad in a reasonably negative environment. Similarly to others in this field, I've given up TV and use my mind instead of letting it use me (Eckhart Tolle, Wayne Dyer). I am living most of the Napoleon Hill principles and experimenting with the Law of Attraction. Constantly operating in the upper levels has been with me only in the past 2 months. It takes hard work but I enjoy this journey a lot. I love this kind of topics and those "a-ha" moments.

Scott points out the importance of enjoying the action. One of my goals is to make music that a specific audience enjoys. However, I can't always focus on joy while doing the small steps. Learning all the little tricks of music production is not always that much fun. Choosing the best of 400+ samples (finding them in the first place!), then mixing many together to produce a single kickdrum doesn't sound like 3 great days, does it?In reality it's not like "Let's play the piano and the song is done". [update: That's bullshit, but] The illustration is perfect.

I agree with the three steps (1. Enjoy the Action, 2. There Is Only Now, 3. Build Momentum). I'd add what needs to precede them is finding your why, getting to the level neccessary to live proactively. Unless you see the why behind proactivity, why would you want to persistently take action?

No matter if it's positive or negative, wanted or unwanted, it all adds up in the long run. Live your life proactively to attract what you want into your life. Take the baby steps; they will add up. The whole is almost always greater than the sum of the parts.

Recently I have reached one of the biggest goals I've ever set in my life. It took many years to accomplish and now it's finally done. So I'm going on with my journey. I have set new goals because they give a certain quality to my present moments.

Using GTD and many other organizational techniques for more than a year, I feel like my life is on track now. There are still some things needed to be cleaned up and that's what I'll be doing in the following days. If you were expecting something from me and didn't get it yet, be sure you will, probably in a week or less (let me know if not but I shouldn't forget anything because it's all outside my head--in a trusted system).

To bring one’s self to a frame of mind and to the proper energy to accomplish things that require plain hard work continuously is the one big battle that everyone has. When this battle is won for all time, then everything is easy.
- Thomas A. Buckner

This is an interesting concept that I am experimenting with at the moment but have never put a name on it. Following a combination of many time management and productivity methods, I believe Scott's article on Energy vs Time makes a whole lot of sense. You are planning your days inside out, still, you usually can't finish what you've planned for the day and you blame your self-discipline for it. Or even worse, you think that you don't have enough time even though time is the only constant resource available to us (past and future doesn't exist anyways).

In the last months I had all four kinds of energy-recovering activities scheduled for each day: physical, mental, emotional and spiritual (I consider personal development to cover mainly the last two). I've been constantly reminding myself of the importance of "sharpening the saw", a Covey-principle, the 7th habit. However, I needed Scott's article to notice that Covey doesn't only mean spiritual but all four actually.

Suppose you came upon someone in the woods working to saw down a tree. They are exhausted from working for hours. You suggest they take a break to sharpen the saw. They might reply, " I didn't have time to sharpen the saw, I'm busy sawing!"

I simply used to say "take time off" but this doesn't cover the deeper meaning behind it: you need to consciously balance the four levels to get the most out of your life (and be the most productive also).

I met Scott through the blogospehere several months ago. He has a great blog with many topics in my interests, if you're somewhat like me, be sure to give it a try!

Below my notes of the eye-opening Eckhart Tolle audio recording "Lasting Happiness". Enjoy.

--

The collective is always looking to the next thing, the next moment in the hope that happiness will be found there or that I will find a more complete version of myself there. Seeking it/looking for a state that lies somewhere in the future. That becomes a pattern built into the very structure of the human mind. The seeking pattern.

Thats a very "normal" thing to be doing:
- The bank robber does that because he's not interested in the money but what promise the money holds.
- Spiritual seeker who is looking for the answer. Enlightenment perhaps. That will finally provide lasting happiness.

"The human seeking mode" - so normal for most human beings to be in the seeking mode that too many it hasn't even occured that they are in this mode or a different state of consciousness is possible. Wherever you watch (TV, media, films) almost everybody is in that seeking mode.

The present moment is regarded as insufficient. I am not yet enough. I am not happy. I can only be happy if I finally arrived at that sense of completion within myself. The bank robber seeks that through the money.

"I need more time to find it". Time-bound consciousness: whatever you do is governed by the notion of time. Unless you're very old it will be future that is greater importance to you. In older people the past assumes a greater importance. They remember it. Memory of me and my past. Think about it & talk about it. Because future has shrunk. Some of them haven't realized yet that they don't have too much future left so they are still looking for "more".

Mentally constructed image. Conceptualized me. Memories, conditioned patterns, experiences, all kinds of identifications which became thoughts make up a bundle of thoughts and emotions, and that mentally created bundle becames a sense of self in me. It is that mind made me a story, my story, my history, that most humans derive sense of self from. That self is in the seeking mode ("not enough"). "I am not fully myself yet". "If I could only be more then I could finally arrive at self completion".

The need for more becomes overriding in ones daily existence. More to add to who I think I am (to me). To a child (this mind-movement starting): claims possession of something (screaming "it's mine!"). It's not the toy. It's the word MY toy. I have invested the thought form of toy with the sense of self. We are all collectively conditioned to do that. It's the beginning of delusion. Fearing that something I regard as "me" will be removed from me. The child grows, the toy becomes the car, other possessions.

Suffering that is there whenever you have not really found yourself. That is built into the very structure of that mind-made identity because suffering is that sense of luck/not enough/fear that underlies that state of consciousness.

You've made it in the eyes of the world, yet, it doesn't seem to have worked. Then looking for explanations. If you make it: everybody tells you should be happy now. You still feel that pain. Some start drinking/take drugs. The illusion has been removed from them that the future will complete them.

Suddenly see the fiction of the self that the entire culture is emersed in and tells you this is how it is. Then you might be interested going beyond that. You realize that happiness on that level cannot be found. The illusion of happiness - yes. Many times.

That neediness expresses itself in many ways that create enormous amount of suffering--to others around you and to yourself. The need for more, to enhance me, the me that is never complete, the story of me, that hasn't quite worked the way it was supposed to work. Up till now. There are not many humans who feel that the story has gone very well indeed. The story of me. And if there are some, all you have to do is wait a little. And then the sense of incompleteness returns. People believe it to be a personal problem (everybody seems to be OK, except me).

Need for more = need for conflict in order to enhance ones seperate sense of existence. "this is the me and this is the other". The "need" for enemies: self-identification. A greedy entity is simply a magnification of that mind pattern.

Underneath the conceptualized me is deeper consciousness that is not conditioned in every human. Redemptive factor in human existence. Underneath there is a dimension of consciousness that we could describe as unconditioned, vast--but they don't know that. Most humans don't know it but more and more and waking up to it now.

Complaints in the head: every complaint is an attempt to be a little bit more of me. Seeing means you are no longer identified with the pattern.

The main ENEMY of the mind-made self is THIS MOMENT. Awake from self-identification of thought into now. A certain alertness comes with that. More aware of sense-perceptions. Moving out of the trap of compulsive conceptualized thinking. From being the thinker to being the awareness that is prior to thought.

Stillness. Unconscious? No. Consciousness, but not the labels, the thinking. Peace in the background.

"-I'm on my way. -Where to? -The future." You continually miss this moment.

The arising of spaciousness inside yourself is really what it is. Until you find some place in yourself. Without that space you can look for happiness for a hundred lifetimes, because you're only looking to objects in your consciousness believe that "when I've accumulated enough objects in my consciouness I'll be full and complete".

Discover in ones self that dimension of consciousness; realizing the fullness of being enough yourself that is already here. That's the end of seeking. Not the end of doing but the end of self-seeking through doing. Than doing becomes quite nice; it's a play; you participate in the game of universe; you cannot not do; so you might as well participate; you do; it's a dance. But self-seeking goes out of the doing because you've already found yourself. Not as a conceptual entity; as the depth, the still, spacious, field; within yourself. Future cannot help you to get there, it can only prevent you from finding it.

What is the quickest way to realizing the truth of this? Is there a shortcut? How can I know this without making it into a future state that I want to achieve? How? This is so simple. Secret of the universe (as far as humans are concerned in the present evolutionary stage).

The secret lies in simply no longer internally resisting, denying or running away from what IS at THIS moment. To find an inner alignment with the form that this moment takes. The conceptualized egoic entity can't do that. But you can do that.

The conceptualized egoic entity lives in the state of NO to what IS.

"But this current form of moment limits me so much!"--You can play around with different forms in your life and experiment and expand into other forms not expecting to find the limitless. It's in the nature of form to be limited.

Whatever may be happening in your life and be the greatest limitation, it is not only the limitation, it's also the opening, when it's not internally resisted. The opening into space. Space comes with the YES to WHAT IS. You are no longer bound to what is = the form. You know your self as the formless one life/one consciousness. That's the true happiness that lasts. Nothing needs to change for this transition to happen in your life.

Say yes to WHAT IS.