My very best friend passed away on Saturday in a tragical car accident. He was my family in the sense that he cared the most about me in the world. I always thought about him like my brother. Now he suddenly left and everything's empty. He was 20 years old and healthier than most of us. He wasn't even driving the car and whenever he did he was very careful.

If I have to sum up my past 7-8 years, I'd say it was all about him. All. My work, my free time, my thoughts, everything, all my life. I am very unsure about how to go on now. We always respected and were looking up to each other. We knew each other better than anybody else on this planet. He probably didn't know but I learned more from our relationship than from anything else. Although there are lots of friends supporting me now, I still feel like I'm very alone here. Especially because we both have had this feeling so we promised several months ago that we'll stay together until the end of our lives. It seemed like natural because we were totally the same and had very similar dreams, goals, and more importantly, values.

I'll live the very best life I can in the hope that I'll see him again when I die and he can be proud of me as he always was.



One of his voice messages clearly reflect how much we liked each other (and the English language): arctis02.mp3

I am so proud of you and always were Arctis, you are the best person I have ever met in my life and you'll always be. I make sure your dreams come true on this world. I'll finish the projects we've started, release your music and open the cafe for you that you were dreaming about all the time. It'll wear your name.

You had the greatest impact on my life, ever.

You are awesome. I miss you a lot and I always will.

I am asking for patience and understanding from everybody because even though I thought I lost my family several years ago, this is the point in time when I really did.