Long time no blog. :)

It would be kinda hard to explain everything that has happened in a single post, so let's kickstart it this time with my Top 5 Favorite blogs at the moment:

Signal vs Noise by 37signals
http://www.37signals.com/svn/

New Rules for the New Economy by Kevin Kelly
http://www.kk.org/newrules/blog/

Lessons Learned (The Lean Startup) by Eric Ries
http://startuplessonslearned.blogspot.com/

Trizle. Rock Business.
http://www.trizle.com/

Essays by Paul Graham
http://www.paulgraham.com/articles.html

Hope to be posting more soon. Until then, check me out on Tumblr and Twitter!

When you use latin2 (or perhaps any non-latin1) encoding you probably bump into the issue of not having the desired punctuation in the character set. In the Hungarian language, for example, such characters would be:
- the "ndash" HTML entity –
- the quotation characters „ and ”

So how come you didn't notice it yet? It's because your browser recognizes that you aren't using utf-8 so it encodes those values to their HTML entity equivalents before sending the request to your server. Your server may store these values in the database and when rendering an HTML page, they simply get handed over to the browser in the HTML source and they appear properly on the user interface. Or aren't they?!

You sure want to use htmlspecialchars() to properly encode database values before outputting them to the browser (especially if your DB consists of any custom user input). The problem with htmlspecialchars() is that it converts the first character of any HTML entity (&) to its HTML entity equivalent as well, which is &. Thus, for example, – becomes –. What happens is what we might call "double encoding".

In some special cases you may trust the data you are displaying and remove htmlspecialchars() so no escape is happening. This isn't the desired behavior either though, because then you cannot enter less-than (<) or greater than signs (>), for example, since they will end up in the HTML source unencoded and produce undesired results because the browser will recognize them as HTML tag markers. Sure, you can still enter their HTML entity equivalents &lt; and &gt; but that's not too convenient.

The issue has been addressed in PHP 5.2.3 by a quick fix: it introduces a fourth htmlspecialchars() parameter, bool $double_encode, which is true by default to stay backwards-compatible. You can set it to false, so any HTML entity occurence in the string you pass to it won't get encoded again but the rest of the values still will.

This seems to work fine: the browser recognizes the use of a single-byte character set, which, in our example contains a special punctuation character (like „ and ”), so converts it to the HTML entity equivalent, and the server, when displaying the value, converts any "standard" special HTML characters (like < and >) to their HTML entity equivalents. This is fine for most applications.

There are still (at least) two issues with this approach though: special punctuation characters will end up encoded in your database, and, because of this:
a) your searches will not be consistent: if you submit a search for "ash", you get back all records which contain an &ndash; "character" also
b) your field length isn't accurate anymore: if your field is declared as varchar(100) in MySQL, for example, you can't store 100 characters in it unless the value contains no special punctuation.

So, if you want to create websites and/or applications which are totally perfect from a linguistic point of view as well (and you want, because you want to Set Higher Standards for yourself and those around you), you need to use utf-8 even if there's a native character set available for the language you are using.

Davey Shafik raised an interesting point in his blog: experts tend to direct beginners to the GTD book instead of providing advice. I think the reasons for this are

a) GTD cannot be explained in short. It's a complex (but very well structured) system. You need to read the book (and optionally listen to audio materials, read forums etc) to deeply understand the concepts behind the system.

b) There aren't as much experts as one might think. I think most people never "get it". David Allen said that he doesn't know too many people on the planet either who care enough about their time to follow the principles 100%.

Regarding self-discipline, David Allen said that people don't need more self-discipline, they need a disciplined approach. I'd suggest everybody to read his second book titled "Ready for Anything" first. It answers the "why" behind the concepts while the first book tends to focus mainly on the "how".

Another usually misunderstood concept is procrastination. GTD doesn't help to overcome it at all but helps to predefine tasks so you can constructively procrastinate instead of surfing the web. David Allen said that the most effective people on the planet are the biggest procrastinators. The weekly review is absolutely necessary because that's when you define your tasks to procrastinate with.

Regarding software and other tools available for GTD out there, I've tried most of them. Sadly all of them sucks. They don't follow the strict GTD principles. Their creators tend to have "better" or "more efficient" ideas than David Allen had during the 19 years he put into this system until now (at least they think so). 99% of the time those ideas turn out to be wrong or inconsistent.

If you are interested in one single advice, I'd suggest you to stick to what David Allen says and don't try to change anything. If something doesn't fit into the system, you probably need to restructure your thoughts so that it does. It's very important to stick to the GTD language. Think in open loops, not projects; next actions, not tasks. It sadly seems that David Allen uses the word "project" inconsistently (although he doesn't). It's better not to use this word at all: they are either 1-2 year goals or open loops. This all might seem to be nitpicking but otherwise you can't benefit from the clean edges that the system defines. If you follow the principles, it's always obvious where anything fits in the grander scheme of things.

If I had to summarize GTD, I'd say it helps cleaning up your environment using the bottom-up approach (from "what's on your mind at this moment?" up to "what's your life purpose?") enabling you to focus on higher levels of your life as well. "The longer your horizon, the smarter your moves."

GTD is not about work. It's about getting the most out of your life. If you use it only for your work, you get stuck at the level of 30,000ft (1-2 year goals) or 40,000ft (3-5 year vision). There are many parallel things on these levels besides your work and if you want to get the most out of your life, you should seriously consider discovering them! On the other hand, it's an absolutely good idea to start GTDing only with your work (as long as that's what takes most of your attention), then move on to other areas of your life some months later when work needs much less thinking.

Here's a small internal script I keep trying to run on my mind:
crank widgets until interrupt;
on interrupt dump raw input;
on confused do a review;

Finally, some tips for those who've been GTDing for a while:
Always define exactly 1 next action on your next actions lists for each open loop. Defining more leads to anxiety and those steps will change anyways. If you want to dump those next actions out of your head, handle them as project support material. Also, if you seem to have parallel next actions then you probably need multiple open loops instead (with multiple desired outcomes).

Hopefully these random thoughts help you but you can find many more in the second book which I mentioned above.

"Procrastinators often follow exactly the wrong tack. They try to minimize their commitments, assuming that if they have only a few things to do, they will quit procrastinating and get them done. But this goes contrary to the basic nature of the procrastinator and destroys his most important source of motivation. The few tasks on his list will be by definition the most important, and the only way to avoid doing them will be to do nothing. This is a way to become a couch potato, not an effective human being."
--John Perry, Structured Procrastination

"The whole idea is to give yourself a whole lot of really really constructive things to do as a way to avoid the really real things you need to be doing. [..] So as long as you're gonna waste time you might as well have a big range of things you can go procrastinate with that actually are reasonably good things to do. [..] Just make sure you've got reasonably healthy things as a way to avoid the stuff you really don't wanna go do."
--David Allen, @ 43 Folders' Productive Talk Episode 1: Procrastination

This is why the weekly review is so essential: it makes you choose things consciously to procrastinate with.

See this post also: My Take on Procrastination.

Our latest trance mix for the past year is available for download (57 MB, 39 mins 39 secs).

Tracklist:
Arksun - Arisen (original)
Re:Locate feat Menno De Jong - Spirit (original)
Above & Beyond - Alone Tonight (original)
Mike Shiver - Morning Drive (original)
Temple 1 - Eternal Light (original)
Jonas Steur - Sonrisa (original)

Set higher standards.

Recently I ran into this interesting article about soul mates on the web.

"You can almost always spot soul-mates, because they make each other more powerful as a team than they were apart! This is the first way to spot your soul mate.

If you are in a relationship, and you're having to rationalize how much this other person helps you (or hinders you) then they are not your soul mate. It's like two gloves of different shapes, purpose, and sizes. You can put them together, but they just don't look or work as good. Put two large handyman gloves together for the workman, or put two gardening size smalls together for the woman in the garden club, and now you can get some work done!

Take the word soul, add the definition with the definition for mate, and you've got a strong definition of a soul mate: "the core spiritual nature, immortal, inseparable even from death, mated to be together."

Considering this definition, let us also consider the second way to spot your soul mate: they are both aware of their spiritual nature. In most (I say most, because not all people acknowledge God publicly in the same way I do) cases, these two will have their eyes first upon God, second upon each other, third upon their purpose together. Their family, career, and other things will always follow in some priority after these three.

The third way to spot a soul mate is to recognize how the journeys of the two interrelate. All Soul mates are on a spiritual life journey. These journeys, when the souls coincide for maximum impact, almost always run parallel or coincide in such as way that that creates a relationship as much or more about the union, or the team, as the individual.

This is the third way to spot a soul mate: they put the team/partnership journey above their individual journey and desires. In the case of the woman and the man above, the choices are not so painful, as their joint purpose and joint relationship is going to support the individual's dream. The reason for this is that the individual's dream is complementary to the union in a soul mate relationship. At the same time, the relationship works in a way that each person's individual journey is fully supported. With soul mates, there is trust and respect. With trust and respect comes the ability to realize aspirations - both as a couple and as individuals.

The fourth way to spot your soul mate is to recognize how each partner (mate) brings real love into the other's life. If a person does not bring real love to you, but instead causes significant conflict, grief, angst, lack, and failure, then it is highly unlikely that this person is your soul mate. A soul mate helps to awaken your soul and makes it easier for you to learn the lessons you are meant to learn. A key difference is that the soul mate is not the lesson, they help you learn your lessons and support that growing process! The other relationships usually are the lesson and make it difficult to learn (especially when the participants are on a relationship merry-go-round of dysfunctional relationships).

Are you someone who is frustrated with searching high and low trying to find this soul mate, so much that you're starting to give up and feel it is a myth? You are not alone. However, there is hope for you in the faith of your clarity in the purpose of your mission. In the law of attraction, we must send out the thought and be something in harmony in order to connect with what or who we seek. This is the fifth way to spot your soul mate: there are harmonious and complementary natures between the two mated people.

Sometimes, when people are coming from ego, rather than spirit, the relationship becomes about what you have (possessions) rather than who, or who, you are (experiences). Soul mates are about experiences far more than possessions. Because you cannot take your possessions with you. Your spirit does not own your possessions. But your spirit does own your experiences."

Please find the rest of the article here

Never give up on searching. Soul mates do exist.

Did you notice there's just too much of anything?

Too much people, too much jobs, too much opportunities, too much thoughts, too much places, too much projects, too much fun, too much everything.

The problem is not that you don't have enough options, it's that you have too many.

Passion arises when you consciously decide to stick to some of them whatever it takes.

That's the real importance of selection.

Learn to say no so that you can say yes to the things you truly love.

You enter somebody's life and realize you have the greatest impact on it. Only later you do realize what impact this has on yours. If you want a good friend, be a good friend first. Improving somebody else's life has the greatest impact on yours.

This is so essential that I have to post it here. Originally posted in one of my favourite forums by Andy Martin from Manifest Revolution.

"The reason I didn't choose anything was because I was afraid of not choosing the best thing. I think lack of passion stems from the same root cause as boredom. In fact, they might just be the same thing. Boredom doesn't result from having nothing to do; it results from having too many appealing options. When you have many attractive and interesting options nothing rises above the rest -- it doesn't matter how high the line is, it's still a flat line. It turns into a sort of analysis paralysis."

This applies to so many parts of my life. Mainly to friendships and my projects at the moment (regarding businesses, see also my related post titled Decisions). If you're into music production, do you see how this is in parallel with EQing instruments?

Choose wisely.

"Friendship is a term used to denote co-operative and supportive behaviour between two or more social entities. In this sense, the term connotes a relationship which involves mutual knowledge, esteem, and affection. Friends will welcome each other's company and exhibit loyalty towards each other, often to the point of altruism. Their tastes will usually be similar and may converge, and they will share enjoyable activities. They will also engage in mutually helping behavior, such as exchange of advice and the sharing of hardship. A friend is someone who may often demonstrate reciprocating and reflective behaviors. Yet for many, friendship is nothing more than the trust that someone or something will not harm them. Value that is found in friendships is often the result of a friend demonstrating on a consistent basis:
- the tendency to desire what is best for each other.
- sympathy and empathy.
- honesty, perhaps in situations where it may be difficult for others to speak the truth.
- mutual understanding.

(wikipedia)

Quotes

The Christian Gospels state that Jesus Christ declared, "No one has greater love than this, to lay down one's life for one's friends." (John 15:13)

"The only pure love in the world is that between best friends" -- TJ Sanders

"Everyone hears what you say. Friends listen to what you say. Best friends listen to what you don't say." -- Anon

"Many people will walk in and out of your life, but only true friends will leave footprints in your heart." -- Anon

"I believe in angels, the kind that heaven sends. I'm surrounded by angels, but I call them my best friends." -- Anon

"A friend is someone who knows all about you... and loves you anyway." -- Anon

"Friends are the people God gave us to keep us company... Best friends are the siblings God forgot to give us..." -- Anon

"Who finds a faithful friend, finds a treasure." -- Jewish saying

"Hold a true friend with both your hands." -- Nigerian Proverb

"Friendship needs no words..." -- Dag Hammarskjold.

"A companion loves some agreeable qualities which a man may possess, but a friend loves the man himself." -- James Boswell

"One loyal friend is worth ten thousand relatives." -- Euripides

"A good friend is my nearest relation." -- Thomas Fuller

"Your friend is your needs answered." -- Kahil Gibran

"A sympathetic friend can be quite as dear as a brother." -- Homer

"However rare true love may be, it is less so than true friendship." -- La Rochefoucauld

"Life is partly what we make it, and partly what it is made by the friends whom we choose." -- Tehyi Hsieh

"Grief can take care of itself, but to get the full value of a joy you must have somebody to divide it with." -- Mark Twain

"A single rose can be my garden... a single friend, my world." -- Leo Buscaglia

"It's the ones you can call up at 4:00 a.m. that really matter." -- Marlene Dietrich

"The language of friendship is not words but meanings." -- Henry David Thoreau

Conclusion

I'm stuck at the middle of the pyramid.

It still hurts so damn much.

Dedicated to Arctis.

"If I had one gift that I could give you, my friend, it would be the ability to see yourself as others see you, because only then would you know how extremely special you are."
- B.A. Billingsly

"The best kind of friend is the kind you can sit on a porch and swing with, never say a word, and then walk away feeling like it was the best conversation you've ever had."
- Unknown

"Friends are those rare people who ask how you are and then wait to hear the answer"
- Unknown

"If you should die before me, ask if you can bring a friend."
- Stone Temple Pilots

"How lucky I am to have known someone who was so hard to say goodbye to"
- Unknown

I have already seen this video but I bumped into it again and got more out of it now.

1. About Connecting The Dots
You can't connect the dots looking forward. You can only connect them looking backwards. So you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future. You have to trust in something because believing that the dots will connect down the road will give you the confidence to follow your heart even when it leads you off the well-known path and that will make all the difference.

2. About Love and Loss
Sometimes life hits you in the head with a brick. Don't lose faith. I'm convinced that the only thing that kept me going was that I loved what I did. You've got to find what you love. And that is as true for your work as it is for your lovers. Your work is going to fill a large part of your life, and the only way to be truly satisfied is to do what you believe is great work. And the only way to do great work is to love what you do. If you haven't found it yet, keep looking. Don't settle. As with all matters of the heart, you'll know when you find it. And, like any great relationship, it just gets better and better as the years roll on. So keep looking until you find it. Don't settle.

3. About Death
When I was 17, I read a quote that went something like: "If you live each day as if it was your last, someday you'll most certainly be right." It made an impression on me, and since then, for the past 33 years, I have looked in the mirror every morning and asked myself: "If today were the last day of my life, would I want to do what I am about to do today?" And whenever the answer has been "No" for too many days in a row, I know I need to change something.

Your time is limited, so don't waste it living someone else's life. Don't be trapped by dogma--which is living with the results of other people's thinking. Don't let the noise of others' opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary.

We are on the constant lookout for finding the purpose that fulfills us and usually complain we can't figure out what to do with our lives. It's hard to spot we've already found and have been working on it for a long time.

It just occured to me that I have changed the world for my friend. In the past 7.5 years I've always been there listening to and supporting him. I can't recall a single event when I cancelled a meeting. I've introduced him to the world of djing, music production and sound studios which later became his purpose. I had taught all the little tricks I knew to him. I've been talking to him in English because he loved it. I was just there whenever he needed me. I have never regretted any second I spent with him. I've provided encouragement to him in this negative environment that we live in. I have proven to him that you can reach your dreams if you keep acting upon them. I've paved the way in many areas where he was able to excel if he wanted to.

I've made many sacrifices (left a job, moved back home etc) but I never regretted any of them. He appreciated my efforts and was very grateful for my unconditional services. We have created a world that supported us better than the physical world we could have experienced instead.

I am so proud of having done this for 8 years. I can't tell you a single other thing I'd have done instead. It worths more than everything else together I did in my life.

He was a brilliant guy. I'm never gonna forget him.

Be there for the people you love. Follow your intuition, follow your heart. My decisions were illogical many times and I have failed a lot but you know what? I don't mind. What's more, I think I made the best decisions even if they seemed dangerous at the moment.